One of my goals for this blog is to talk about real things with you and to be as open and transparent as possible. And I have to tell you the truth, I have been struggling with something lately. Comparing yourself to others is one thing that I think a lot of people struggle with.
As, a “wannabe” creative entrepreneur, scrolling through Instagram and looking at Pinterest it is sometimes overwhelming seeing so many successful, creative people online. We are flooded with beautiful images and glamorous success stories and it is easy to feel inadequate or sub-par. I have definitely been feeling this way.
I have times where I feel so far from where I want to be and it seems to me that so many others have been successful on a level I will never reach. I see all of these amazing bloggers, creatives, and entrepreneurs who are living the life that I want and it makes me feel not good enough. The self-doubt and fear start to get to me to a point where I almost want to just stop and give up on this dream of mine. Have you felt this way too?
But then I came across a phrase that changed everything. The phrase was, “someone else’s success is not your failure.” As I really thought about what this phrase meant, my mood instantly changed and I went from feeling depressed and discouraged to feeling a new wave of hope and optimism wash over me. Realizing that someone else’s success does not mean that my own endeavors will be unsuccessful was such a powerful message for me. I don’t know about you but I want to avoid those feelings of inadequacy and jealousy in the future so I came up with some ways to help you (& me) stop comparing yourself to others.
Take a break from social media
Just put the phone away. For an hour or two (or as long as you can), stay off of Instagram, Pinterest, Twitter, Facebook, etc. and focus on yourself. Work on some projects you have been putting aside or practice your calligraphy skills, which is what I do personally. If you’re into baking, do that. Just do what ever makes you feel good and important and productive.
Social media is a great tool but if you start comparing yourself and your business to others all the time you will dig yourself into a dark little hole where you feel alone and unaccomplished. and that’s a scary place to be so don’t let that happen.
View other’s success as proof that it’s possible
This kind of goes along with my first point. When you are on social media or reading through blogs and see how amazing other people are doing, don’t let it discourage you. Because what you don’t see is the struggle, dedication and hard work over time that it took those people to get to where they are and to develop their skills.
Don’t compare your success to theirs, instead use their success as proof to yourself that your goals and dreams are achievable. I like to tell myself, “If they can do it, then so can I.”
Keep in mind is that they probably are further along in their journey than you are. I often feel that my work isn’t as creative/beautiful/whatever as other people’s work, but then I remind myself that I have only been on this journey for a few months. A few months! The entrepreneurs and bloggers that I am comparing myself to have been doing this for years (or at least one year). Chances are that they started out in a place similar to where I am now and have grown into the success that they are today. Which means that it is totally possible for you an me to achieve that success as well.
Celebrate your accomplishments, not matter how small
Don’t get so busy hustling that you forget to pat yourself on the back for all of the things that you have accomplished, even if they are small. Maybe you don’t have tens of thousands of page views on your blog, but hey, at least you started a blog and have been constantly posting on it. Maybe, you only have one sale on Etsy (like me) but it’s still a sale and that something to celebrate!
Every small thing that you accomplish is still an accomplishment and you should be proud of it. If you are working hard and continually trying to achieve your goals then you haven’t failed. So, if nothing else, celebrate the fact that you haven’t given up.
I wanted to share this with you to remind you that it’s okay to have those feelings of not being good enough or feeling like you are not going to achieve your dreams. But don’t let those feeling control your actions. Don’t let the outside noise derail you from creating the things or doing the work that you have a passion for.
They say that “comparison is the thief of joy” and I believe this to be so true. I’m telling you right now to just stop. The only person you should compare yourself to is the person that you were yesterday. I believe that we can recognize and appreciate other people’s work and success but it doesn’t have to hold us back from going after our own success in life, because everyone deserves it.
Challenge: the next time you start comparing yourself to others, do these 3 things and see how it helps you!
With kindness and encouragement,
Do you struggle with comparison an not feeling good enough? What other tips or advice do you have for overcoming it? I would love to hear about it in the comments below! And don’t forget to subscribe to the blog!